Warning- This post contains language that may not be suitable for all readers. If this describes you, kindly fuck off. :-D
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| There should be no x over this because cursing is wonderful. |
Oh the misguided search results this post is going to cause... Lol. I love to curse. I really do. It just works so well in almost any given situation. It is a wonderful way to express yourself. Whether it is to express happiness, like "That's fucking awesome!" or extreme annoyance, like "What a fucking asshole!" Of course, I can restrain myself when necessary if I know that it truly bothers people or I'm in a church or something. Haha. But that's not very fun. I always enjoy myself when I'm around others where no editing is necessary, especially when I want to rant about something. The cursing definitely becomes more prominent when I'm stressed or upset about something. When the first thing I say when I get home is "You won't fucking believe this fucking asshole I had to talk to at work today!" my husband knows it hasn't been a good day.
Now, I am not a doctor or anything, but this is my personal opinion on some of the health benefits of cursing.
- Cursing relieves stress. Don't you feel better after you've been able to vent to someone about all the things that have been bugging you? Doing so while peppering the conversation with expletives works even better! It's like pushing on a valve to release a bit of the stress inside you each time you do it, keeping you from EXPLODING!
-Cursing can help lower your blood pressure. This is all purely independent research, but I actually took my blood pressure at work various times throughout the week and found that it was lower after I'd cursed a lot. Seriously! See relieving stress above, it's all related.
-Cursing can help alleviate pain. Now you all perked up, didn't you? I found the following in
this online article.
A recent study published in NeuroReport found that participants who immersed their hands in icy water and were allowed to shout expletives experienced significantly less prickly, numbing pain than when they repeated neutral words. Researchers speculate that cursing activates the stress response, boosting the body's pain threshold to deal with crisis. Pretty sweet, huh?
-Cursing adds to an overall sense of wellness. Well you aren't feeling stressed anymore, you have good blood pressure, and you're able to take one hell of a spanking! How could you not feel better after all of that? Cursing is kind of like road rage. You don't have to pull out the big guns, but a bit of muttering under your breath will make you feel better, one f bomb at a time.
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| Ah, the things you can buy in NYC. |
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Now I hope any tops out there that are reading this can see the logic in my points and ignore the usual "top logic." Many tops find cursing one of the top things on their list of spankable offenses. Yes, I'm speaking from experience. I've been spanked for cursing on more than one occasion, even had my mouth washed out with soap. Blech. But I still have hope that one day tops will see the error of their ways and realize that cursing is a really beneficial thing. It can even be used for a top's benefit in the way of giving feedback in a scene. "Shit, that hurts!" is letting you know that you're doing a good job!
The following is content I had in one of those forwarded emails you see again and again, and really cracks me up.
Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words in the English language today is the word "fuck". It is the one magical word which, just by its sound, can describe pain, pleasure, love, and hate.
In language, "fuck" falls into many grammatical categories.
- It can be used as a verb, both transitive (John fucked Mary) and intransitive (Mary was fucked by John).
- It can be an action verb (John really gives a fuck), a passive verb (Mary really doesn't give a fuck), an adverb (Mary is fucking interested in John), or as a noun (Mary is a terrific fuck).
- It can also be used as an adjective (Mary is fucking beautiful) or an interjection (Fuck! I'm late for my date with Mary).
- It can even be used as a conjunction (Mary is easy, fuck she's also stupid).
As you can see, there are very few words with the overall versatility of the word "fuck". Aside from its sexual connotations, this incredible word can be used to describe many situations...
Greetings "How the fuck are ya?"
Fraud "I got fucked by the car dealer."
Resignation "Oh, fuck it!"
Trouble "I guess I'm fucked now."
Aggression "FUCK YOU!"
Disgust "Fuck me."
Confusion "What the fuck.......?"
Difficulty "I don't understand this fucking business!"
Despair "Fucked again..."
Pleasure "I fucking couldn't be happier."
Displeasure "What the fuck is going on here?"
Lost "Where the fuck are we."
Disbelief "UNFUCKING BELIEVABLE!"
Retaliation "Up your fucking ass!"
Denial "I didn't fucking do it."
Perplexity "I know fuck all about it."
Apathy "Who really gives a fuck, anyhow?"
Greetings "How the fuck are ya?"
Suspicion "Who the fuck are you?"
Panic "Let's get the fuck out of here."
Directions "Fuck off."
Disbelief "How the fuck did you do that?"
It can be used in an anatomical description- "He's a fucking asshole."
It can be used to tell time- "It's five fucking thirty."
It can be used in business- "How did I wind up with this fucking job?"
It can be maternal- "Mother fucker."
It can be political- "Fuck Dan Quayle!" It has also been used by many notable people throughout history...
"What the fuck was that?"
- Mayor of Hiroshima
"Where the fuck is all this water coming from?"
- Captain of the Titanic
"That's not a real fucking gun."
- John Lennon
"Who's gonna fucking find out?"
- Richard Nixon
"Heads are going to fucking roll."
- Anne Boleyn
"Let the fucking woman drive."
- Commander of Space Shuttle
"What fucking map?"
- "Challenger," Mark Thatcher
"Any fucking idiot could understand that."
- Albert Einstein
"It does so fucking look like her!"
- Picasso
"How the fuck did you work that out?"
- Pythagoras
"You want what on the fucking ceiling?"
- Michaelangelo
"Fuck a duck."
- Walt Disney
"Why?- Because its fucking there!"
- Edmund Hilary
"I don't suppose its gonna fucking rain?"
- Joan of Arc
"Scattered fucking showers my ass."
- Noah
"I need this parade like I need a fucking hole in my head."
- John F. Kennedy
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| More delighful things sold in NYC. |
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So there you have it. Curse away and enjoy yourself. There are plenty of good reasons to do so. I hope we've all learned something today. And if anybody forwards this post to any tops we know who hate cursing, I may have to fucking kill you. :-D
43 comments:
Hmm, I guess you know what's coming for this post next time we meet... I don't give a...
(insert Top vision blocker here)
Omigod Lea! This is too funny! Right from your disclaimer down to the last sentence, I was laughing so fucking hard I couldnt breathe!! :) The historical ones are way too funny, and I love the "maternal" example! How do you do that? THAT was fucking awesome! :) ~sugar
I recall reading that article about the ice water experiment and you know, it makes sense. Think of how much better you feel when something bad happens and you say, "Oh, for FUCK'S sake!!!!"
I know I do.
I also remember the video describing how versatile the word 'fuck' is in the english language!! It was fucking funny!
My favorite is 'fuck you, you fucking fuck!!' Verb, adjective and noun, all in one sentence!!
sarah
A well written and imaginative post. It reminded me of the whole George Carlin "7 words" thing.
That was a great read! Thanks for posting!
~BettyCrocker
Hmmm, so much for expanding one's vocabulary, eh? ;)
lol... very funny post. Cursing works best (in our opinion) when it is used in a humorous way. It can be hilarious too. The time it works the least is when it comes from an angry place. But really, not much about anger does work.
Lewis Black does a pretty good rift about the word 'fuck' btw. He says, in part... "I'll tell ya, in New York City, where I've lived far too long, 'fuck' isn't even a word, it's a comma."
:)
~Todd and Suzy
Lea, that was fucking hysterical! I suppose that I am a "closet cusser," because I only relax my language around people I know VERY well. And, really, what is it with Tops and "language!" Sometimes, only an expletive can describe the situation accurately.
I laughed my way throught the entire blog - thank you, Lea! But you know that you will "pay" for it!
@Urs, At a loss for words? I can suggest a few. ;-)
@sugar, Breathe deep, you'll be alright! Glad you enjoyed it!
@sarah, Yes that's a great one! And thank you for mentioning it, it reminded me to go back and add some relevant pics I took in NYC. :-)
@Spanky, Ah yes, George Carlin. Good stuff. Thanks for stopping by!
@Betty Crocker, I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for stopping by!
@Sara, Oh there are many ways to expand it still. :-)
@Todd and Suzy, Indeed, a well placed f bomb can really highlight comedy. Love Lewis Black and it's SO true!
@Marne, Exactly! It really is the best way to express something sometimes. Like the word "mindfuck," there is just no edited word that compares to the meaning of that one. And of course I'll pay for it, I always do. ;-)
Plenty of good reasons to curse? I know one big reason not to - one huge heavy wooden paddle that packs a punch - well in my house at least
love and hugs kiwi xxx
You are hilarious. Loved the post.
Haha, Lea! I was looking at the post again and saw the pic you added, and was like, "what the fuck? I don't fucking remember that being there!!"
This is a keeper! Damn, girl, you are funny. :-)
I love to curse. There's an art to it, like anything else. With the right timing and panache, it can be hilarious. Overused or at the wrong time, and it's crass and gratuitous. I did get my mouth washed out with soap as a child for cursing (and I didn't even know what I was saying; I was just parroting), but I sure as fuck wouldn't allow it now! :-)
I swear, this is your best post, yet!
I have always been amused by Effingham, Illinois. To me, it sounds like everyone is too polite to call the town by its real name.
Thanks for the laugh!
--Regan
@kiwi, That could certainly be a deterrent!
@joey, Thanks, glad you enjoyed it.
@sarah, Yep had to go back and add those. Lol.
@Erica, It is an art. Why can't more tops understand that?
@Regan, Never heard of that town, that's funny! Glad you enjoyed it!
*SIGH*
Lea, Lea, Lea.
Good luck, you are going to need it!
;)
Effingham, Illinois.
Now that is funny. Hahahahaha. Regan you are too funny.
*worried*
^Lea shhhh!!! (secret) I thought your post was funny. I just don't want any of the Tops to know I thought it was. You have to remember, I live in close proximity to most of them. You don't. Ok? Get my drift?^
I find it amazing how when I whack my head or shin I can use every curse word I know and fucking is a great all around adjective and used several times in one sentence.
Lucky for me cursing is not a spankable offense, unless I direct it at him. I not that crazy.
Loved your post, Lea.
Fuck! forgot my name.
On behalf of all the other English Brats who just read your post "Bloody hell, that was fucking wicked!"
And might I just mention, a Brilliant film The Kings Speech, in which the King of fucking England, drops the f bomb as a way to combat his stutter.
jaywalker x
Jay, is that what they mean by the King's english? Then I bloody well start using it more often in case I ever get to travel across the pond.
Hi again, Lea.
Em couldn't get in to post here so she wanted me to share this with you. Actually Jay Walker originally told Em about it.
http://youtu.be/Q_dW8QNwqJg
@bree, Thank you for the luck. And I understand that you can't openly laugh too hard in case tops are lurking around. I may lack self preservation but do understand the concept. ;-)
@Kaki, Glad you enjoyed it! Thankfully my husband doesn't care about cursing, but when I'm around certain top friends I have to watch it.
@Jay Walker, Hello and welcome! Now I MUST add that movie to my NetFlix list. ;-)
@bree on behalf of em, Fabulous! I listened to all 3 minutes. I've got to check out that movie.
Lea,
You are so fucking creative!! You have a fucking wicked sense of humor.
Come April your bottom will be saying one of two things:
Why the fuck did you write this or Fuuucckkkk am I happy you wrote
this :-) (I'm thinking the latter)
You are great!
Jane
Oh the comments I've been known to leave on posts like this :p BUT in the interest of appreciating creative writing, I'll simply say....Very in-depth journalism.
I fucking love this! :)
We only have so many words, may as well use em all!
LOL...that was such a "fucking" histerical post...I have to agree that it is one of your best..
My only question is...what flavor of "soap" will you choose when you again find yourself in Mr R's proximity???....
I think a nice "hint" of flowery scent will go nicely with the FES..
But it was worth it..
Deb..
@Jane, I might be thinking both at different times. ;-)
@BlackVelvet007, Why thank you! Glad a top can see logic!
@Kat, Glad you enjoyed it! Thanks for stopping by!
@Deb, Well nobody here is going to tell him about this, right?? So that choice won't be something I have to worry about.
Just clicked through from Erica's sight.
Simply Hysterical.
I also love well timed cursing and can remember when and where it was that I first heard the word Asshat. Epic.
Thanks for the tremendous laugh.
Newt
Lea, this made me laugh out loud! A lot!
This is hilarious, and you are brilliant!
Thank you!
@Newt, Hello and welcome! Glad you enjoyed it! "Asshat" is a great word. I really like "Domass", personally.
@Larken, Welcome and thanks for stopping by! I'm always happy to hear I helped someone laugh. :-)
That was hilarious! I don't accept spankings for swearing, since I'm allowed to use all the words, although I have gotten in trouble for using them in the wrong context (for example, saying "fuck you!" to Malignus -_-) a few times.
Your post was full of win and it made me laugh! Thanks for that.
Brilliant, very good post. Thanks for the laugh.
Love,
Ronnie
xx
@alex, I'm glad it gave you a laugh. :-) I have the context problem sometimes too.
@ronnie, Glad you enjoyed it!
An enjoyable and chuckleworthy post indeed, Lea! And scientifically sound.
I agree with Erica, "fuck" is best used like a spice when cooking: an overuse that demonstrates an inability to communicate otherwise is just tiresome; but with good timing, and applied with a pinch of humor, it can be very effective-- LIKE THIS!
@Dave Wolfe, I'm glad it made you laugh. I'm not even a cat person but that pic is adorable and very funny!
I LOVED this post. I curse like it's my job, though I curb it as you do when appropriate. Sir has not yet decided if I should stop or not, so I'm going to continue with my preferred method of expressing myself!
@Lea, He sounds like a keeper! :-)
your site is highly outstanding!!!
@Anonymous, Thanks! Glad you're enjoying reading it!
Lol. It must be good for your health--I feel better already.
@lil, I know, right? Curse on!
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