Sunday, March 3, 2013
He was vanilla and never quite "got it" fully, but he really did try. I'll always give him credit for that. If anything, I think that having something new to explore together made things last longer than they otherwise would have when the relationship was running out of steam. It forced us to communicate a lot more since it brought up hard topics of deep seated needs, compatibility, jealousy. And it made me really take a hard look at myself and what I wanted.
So did the scene directly lead to my relationship ending? No. But I do wonder if the timing hadn't aligned that way, if I hadn't been exploring new things and experiencing new feelings, what would have happened. Would my mind have stayed closed and would I have resigned myself to an empty life? Would I have continued to keep the peace, smile, and stay quiet forever?
It seems a lot of people find themselves here during/after a big life change. Is that purely coincidence? Or does finding ourselves and coming to terms with what we want give us the courage to venture out on a new path, even if it may be a solitary one?
This was a writing I'd posted on my Fetlife recently. I know my readers there and here don't all cross over so wanted to share it here as well. I know not everyone reading here is part of a public kink scene but I'm still curious about your thoughts on this. Was there a particular event in your life that led you to TTWD and made you want to pursue it? If you were/are in a relationship, how has it been affected if at all?